From day one I’ve known prison sees me as worthless. I was instantly rushed to solitary confinement since I can’t be trusted to behave. I received the one-hour express check-in instead of the regular seven-hour prison check-in. My first day of prison I weighed 180 pounds. I was in solitary confinement from 9-6-2011 to 7-27-2022.
Since I’m never getting out of prison I can’t ever set foot in eighty-two prisons in this state. I can only be in maximum security prisons.
I can’t go to school since I’m not getting out of prison. I can’t take a trade. I can’t have job assignments where I would be in multiple areas of the prison. There’s lots of jobs I can’t ever have.
I was transferred to a prison at the edge of the state. The state line was ten miles away. At that prison every day was more or less the same. At that prison I completed numerous Bible study correspondence courses. I spent two years doing courses every day. I would mail one out in the morning and usually receive another one in the mail at night. My faith in God continues to grow the more I study.
That prison fed so bad that 78% of people were on a meat-free meal plan. Five ounces of undercooked beans was slightly more than the regular tray with one scrap of meat. At that prison I got down to 112 pounds.
The prison staffing level kept getting lower. It got to the point where we had no idea if the next meal would be a paper bag or a plastic tray.
The entire solitary confinement building was sent elsewhere. I got sent to the death row building four hours away.
When I got off the bus the first thing I noticed was the electric fence on the roof. The death row building is surrounded by three additional electric fences.
Over time, the death row building got worse and worse. I could look out my window and see the empty parking lot.
At death row I started writing my journal in May 2018. My journal is currently 7,416 pages. Over time I have noticed my writing ability improve.
When I left death row I weighed 120 pounds. Towards the end, death row was giving meals consisting of six ounces total.
Out of nowhere I was sent to a prison two hours away. That prison made me realize just how worthless prison sees me as.
That prison was a mess in every aspect. Within ten minutes of being put in my charred cell I missed the death row building. My cell was all black from fire. It had no hot water. The light was very dim and hurt my eyes to read. The electricity went out multiple times daily.
We never saw the guard since there was no guards. I couldn’t understand how a prison could “operate” when the parking lot is empty every day.
Since there was no guards, at 1 AM breakfast we got two slices of bread and two ounces of grits on the tray. Lunch was at 3 PM and dinner at 9 PM.
My first month at that prison they did no showers. No rec. No laundry. It took me 38 days to attempt to come out of my cell for the first time. My door wouldn’t open. Two days later maintenance showed up to fix my door.
That prison was infested with creatures: rats, roaches, ants, spiders, and crickets. I never turned off my dim light to keep the number of rats and roaches in my cell to a minimum.
Our entire building would flood when it rained. Rain would come in my cell from the window, door, ceiling, and both neighboring cells.
There was zero privacy since all the cells had huge holes. Both of my neighbors could see and hear what I was doing at all times.
I essentially have zero details of my relatives. I don’t even know if they’re dead or alive. They don’t ever reply to my letters. I don’t have anyone’s phone number so I’ve never made a phone call in prison. My last visit was years ago.
It’s best to give people the benefit of the doubt. You only get to see one page of their book. If you could see their entire book, you would completely understand why they are the way they are.
Cesar Hernandez #1666877
Ellis Unit
1697 FM 980
Huntsville, TX 77343
