There are no truly foolproof methods for navigating prison, because prison is many things—differing from era to era, person to person, and place to place. But there are better routes to take. They are all loaded with landmines and potential problems, but some less so than others.
Sadly, much of your success will depend on luck, vigilance, and the ability to constantly adapt to your surroundings. Much of what happens in prison today has neither rhyme nor reason. (And drugs like K2, a hallucinogen, aren’t helping.)
The only truly monolithic thing about prison is that it’s always a place which denies freedom—and sometimes humanity. New arrivals are, to a degree, universally regarded as green and seen as prey or an opportunity of some kind to the onlooker, no matter who they might be. The new arrival should bear this in mind and, as soon as possible, get the most accurate reading on his surroundings—tier, unit, and compound.
The Most Important Rule: Mind Your Own Business
My first piece of advice—a universality that’s time-tested—is to mind your own business. Once, this behavior alone could pretty much provide safe passage for the softest of targets. Though not exactly as it once was, it is still valuable advice. So is the advice to have impeccable manners.
What does it mean to mind your own business? As one might suspect, it’s not entirely black and white. It doesn’t mean sticking your head in the sand and leaving yourself exposed. But nothing that doesn’t immediately concern you should be of interest.
You have to discipline yourself not to have an opinion about things, because you have no idea how much gossip goes on in prison. Neither do you know how gifted some people are at drawing others into their problems. You can find yourself later wondering how you ended up saying things about people you don’t even know. Don’t do that. It’s a really bad move.
Why Manners Matter in Prison
What are impeccable manners? They are much like they sound.
In addition to being a good way to gauge how tense a prison environment is, aside from the obvious and visibly unpredictable person you may encounter, take particular note of those always excusing themselves. Many times, they go from zero to ten over things most people would ignore, if they notice it at all. Yet they don’t want to be accused of being unstable, because that’s viewed as weakness. Others, however, may embrace that reputation and try to live up to it.
In order to have impeccable—or even good—manners, you have to understand the psychology around you. As my father told me after I had been in a couple of years, “Prison is a real close look at a lot of crazy people.”
Use thank you, please, and excuse me or pardon me often. Match or outdo others who use them the same way. It can’t hurt—especially with those who value those small signs of respect.
The Rule My Father Gave Me
The best advice I can give, and which sort of covers everything, is what I was once told.
When I was fifteen years old, with a brand-new life sentence, headed to the Maryland Penitentiary and scared to death, I wrote to my father, who was at another prison. I was told:
“You can’t take no shit. None. But, more importantly, you can’t give none.”
It was a pretty good formula, and it served better for survival than it does with the parole board.
The Mistakes That Get People Into Trouble
For some of us, the second part becomes a lot harder than it sounds.
After the initial alarm and anxieties fade, the previously fearful begin to forget themselves. They develop loose lips, use more drugs than they can afford, borrow more than they can return, exhibit bad faith, try to act like gangsters, and generally carry themselves with bad manners.
These kinds of behaviors will almost always lead to the kind of trouble many people eventually find in houses of correction.
David Webb #187689
