I guess I never felt worthy of anything better, or I never even realized that I could be better. I had dreams and was always a smart kid
In the ghetto, there’s lots of improvisation. As young boys, we were very active and had loads of energy. We liked to play baseball, but lacked the equipment. No problem. For a bat, [...]
He tells her to leave when the D.A. offers fifteen years as the plea bargain. They're on a visit, at Riker's Island. You can’t take this, he tells her. It’ll hurt more when you leave later.
At the ripe young age of eleven, in the fifth grade of elementary school, I was arrested and transferred to Mount Sinai psych ward for assaulting my math teacher, Mr. Friedman. A counselor named Ms. Brown convinced the cops that I should be taken to a hospital instead of a jail cell.
In Texas Prisons, guards are notorious for beating, killing, and harassing prisoners. They also set up prisoners to be attacked by other prisoners while handcuffed from behind, and they're even known to assist prisoners in committing suicide, even when the prisoner has no intentions of doing such thing.
I got out of the Bloods. I realized that it is virtually impossible to consider someone your "brother" without the visceral love that comes with such, which is to say the prevailing emotion one feels in a prison gang is fear.
Dear Younger Self, If you only knew where you were headed and the degree of suffering you will endure, you'd stop the hands of time. But you don't, you can't. Your young mind cannot create such imagery.
There's a prison underground economy. Capitalism is mimicked. There’s upper-class, middle-class and lower-class. Yes. There are prisoners with and there are prisoners without.
One thing is for sure—once you're locked in—you're at the mercy of those with the squeaky boots, the clanking keys, and the ratcheting handcuffs. Even knowing their mighty shields don't make them more human than me, I still worship them. I leap to my feet and rush to the door at the sound of another human.
I miss obeying human beings. Knowing the cop who is having sex with your best friend will give you a donut when you are hungry and wipe the tears from your eyes when a family member passes away.
"Biden said he's sorry for all that crazy shit in his past," G, another African American friend of mine says with a shrug. "If we want people to believe we can change, don't we owe it to him to at least consider he may have changed too?"
A surprising number of white supporters are inside prison for rape, child-molestation, fraud, and embezzlement. In these and white-supremacist groups, he enjoys about a 95% approval rate.
I don't think I will ever be able to understand what could make me do all the shit I did when I was younger. I'm mentally fucked up over my actions. The lady I killed in Wisconsin was a good hard working mother. Her name was Kim Smith and she worked for the county in Waukesha, Wisconsin.
Self-mutilation seems to be a common coping mechanism. Cutting and bleeding. I've seen many hang themselves with a sheet. Even when there's nothing to attach the makeshift rope on.
This is the story of my escape from prison in 2010. What you're about to read is 100% true and you can look it up online.
First one voice joined in, then another and another. I repeated the Jingle Bells chorus, and more of the wing joined in, laughing like crazy, yelling, but not about drugs. “Yo, Mr. Norman, you know any more?”